Coach Tom Shore

     As we prepare for the upcoming trip to Fiji, we have a lot of tasks to complete. One sad effort that came to be was the passing of my youth soccer coach Tom Shore. He was a very influential part of my life and formative years.

Unfortunately, I was unable to attend his service. Luckily, however, my parents were able to be there. My mom did me a favor and read a note that I wrote for, about, to Tom.  

Here is the text of that note.

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An open letter to my “Coach” Tom Shore

From his Goalkeeper

How do you express gratitude in life of how an individual helped to frame, shape and drive you… without insulting, betraying or minimizing that of your parents who did the same? You shouldn’t. You couldn’t. You Wouldn’t. I will.

Fortunately, I came in with a shell of size, of strength, of speed. I competed well with my confidence, my on field antics and vision.  But these traits are not relevant beyond the 90-minute duration and the 18-yard box space.

This 18-yard line box extending left and right, forward and back. And it was my job to command, to control, and to possess it’s being.

Yet it was through that space and relative time that Coach Tom Shore used to craft a plan for me to execute in life. My plan included Focus, Acuity, and Drive.

Tom brought FOCUS with practices and road-trips, limo rides and hotel stays. He exchanged my “hanging from the goalposts” with being a team leader and directing our defense to a sharpened blank sheet of goals against.

Practice. Behave. Evolve. Learn. Try. See it. Want it. Get it. Do it. Then repeat.

10, 11, 12 year old children growing beyond their years in maturity, resilience and opportunity.  Wearing their Skyhawk blue sweat suits proudly in the hallways of their schools, on the corners of their neighborhoods, and on the sidelines of their games.

Tom honed my ACUITY of thought about self by reminding me that sport translates beyond the field. There IS a relationship between Athletics (at which I excelled) and Academics (at which I struggled). Pairing them together I learned (reluctantly at the time) that I too could succeed with pencil, books and rules.

It is I who has the power to choose what becomes of a situation, its happenings and the inevitable outcome. I can wait on my line and let the offensive forces surge into my domain… Or I can give that striker his undeserving two touches on the ball and then charge and be sure that his third is his last, affording me the outcome that I desire and a future that fits the outlet that is deserving: College, Graduate School, Choice.

Tom Took my soul as it lacked judgment (at times) and created a space of compassion and caring, while still holding a competitive edge. Win because you want to win, not just because you can. And I did. We did. And I do. This confidence to stand up tall. To speak. To share. To show.

And was his plan for me deliberate? Perhaps? Perhaps not.

I didn’t realize it at the time, but he was a constant friend, coach and guide to not just me, but to his family, colleagues, neighbors, existing and former players. I didn’t realize it then, but he was helping parents (mine include) build social, political, and household leaders. I didn’t realize it then, but he was framing, shaping, and helping me with the direction of my life.

Words like gratitude, thank you, and appreciation are probably not necessary right now as the calendar has passed us by… but the thoughts of these and the shared emotions that follow, will live on with our beliefs, our behaviors, and our actions!

We 10, 11, and 12 year old boys, now 40-plus year old men, have evolved, maintained, and continue to recognize the value of our upbringing. We show through our life-long friendships and values that what we had was priceless and unrivaled.

Unfortunately, I can’t be there today because I have a commitment to my own 10-year old that is paying his own Competitive tournament. He is employing his skills now that have been passed on from Tom thru me to my son. My son now is in command of his 90 minutes… with his Focus, his Acuity, and his Drive.  From Tom thru me to my son. He has learned his own command… He has learned to command his own 18-yard box.

Goalkeeper

#1
Jay Kreshel